Different flavors of Suicide

Agreement: If you read beyond this point you agree to be 18 years or
older.

"This seems to be surreal but nice"

Have you ever tried committing suicide? Yes, then you are pathetic
looser to not have tried again without making all those mistakes! Go back to
design board and plan a fool proof and "effective"
way.

No, I knew it or else you wouldn't have been reading this, you would have
been working on a new plan.


To explain a few niceties about suicide and types of suicides:


1. Suicide. Plain and simple like those you read in
newspaper and see in movies. No thrill, no excitement in committing suicide,
color-less, flat. Way of the losers or laz(y)-ers.


2. Auto Suicide . This one is more interesting. Don't
compare this with the Biography and Auto-biography analogy, as then you'd be
grossly confused, like those Theory Of Relativity Concepts.
Auto-suicide differs from suicide in the intent for suicide.
Suicide is out of desperation, with hopes in abysmally low state, life in
deep shit, in stinky gutter (well almost all gutters are stinky, though I
never verified); it is more stable and persistent, both the feeling and the
aftereffects! Precursors to Auto-Suicide are more temporal in nature. This
chain of self-sustaining desires can be initiated by both good and bad
feelings; the research has mostly shown it to be good feelings, willingness
of being happy. Auto-Suicide attempts are most effective and rarely
does the deceased person haunt the woods or whatever he would otherwise have
liked to haunt


3. Automated (Auto) Suicide . This term is bequeathed
to the English language by the new world driven by technology. With
automation spreading its wings into every conceivable domain of operation,
suicide, a field, which required extreme courage and determination, is not
left untouched. To help those who fail on both fronts there are Automated
(Auto) Suicide packages, 100% result oriented and very dirt cheap,
neglig(ee) -ble rates of failures, available off the shelf at a very low and
affordable cost. Here the readers have the freedom of asking me "Why does
money come into picture?" Loot, plunder get the cash or else steal the
package itself and who cares what they do after You've used the services??
Why Kamakazi pilots wear helmets?? Effortless, is what the promoters
say.


4. Third person Suicide Murder is a euphemism for
this.



This post is dedicate to Brayandranath